For an Extraordinary one

The signs say this year is your year So I decided to wish you a bad year Good is ordinary at best and ordinary doesn't suit you that is why I wish you a very bad year a year where you loose your keys, your wallet, your socks and your mind. Your phone screen smashes so you will not be able to take a selfie You will be late for work, on a daily basis and no one will even notice a year in which you get chickenpox your boss refuses to give you a sick leave so you go to the work covered with rashes

The girl you love tells you she wants some space The "some space" ends by her engagement announcement on a friend’s Facebook page you invest all your savings in a failed phone app you get lost in the city but you don’t find a cab

In your bad year the promotion you wanted so long, is given to another colleague

A colleague who has neither the experience nor the qualifications But has a family name that can push his career Your bad year Will give a reason for your morning resentment And your sleepless nights It will be an excuse for your bad mood And a justification for your absence I have no hard feelings it's just "Good" is ordinary at best And ordinary doesn’t suit you I promise to keep all your secrets I will not tell anyone that chickens make you scared

And that you snitched on your childhood friend for an extra grade That you cry every time you don't get As

And that you cried when you watched fifty shades of gray I will not tell your little brother that you wet his bed I will not tell your mom that you were the one who broke her favorite porcelain set I will not mention the girl you love or the girl that loves you I will not tell your friends that you didn’t have a cold when you didn't join the soccer match or a family commitment when you missed, watching the Spanish league I will not even tell them that you’re not a soccer fan

And that you can’t really tell Barcelona from Royal Madrid as I said

I have no hard feelings

And your year is already bad Some time you may have doubts You may think I was the one who put your car for sale Or that I created an account for you in a gay dating site

with the name “FistMeDaddy69” You might think I photoshopped your photo in a pro-ISIS march Or that I shared 36 Al-Qaida videos on your facebook page

that I sent your email to the African banks

or added you to moms and housewives groups

that I wrote your phone number in a the wall of a public bathroom

Followed by some slutty offers

And the address of your work and your home

Don’t listen to those trying to come between us you know I have no hard feelings

It’s just ordinary does not suit you so here I am trying to give you an extraordinary life

Extraordinary

like you.